awe, humility, hope and a few other things I might notice

10 Rainy Day Projects

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Start by drinking coffee, good cofffee, hot coffee, mmmm. Sorry got distracted there for a minute.

1)  Write an email to your ex-spouse, in a foreign language that you no longer speak well, just to keep up some good will in case s/he wins the lottery.

2)  Re-organize everything, shelves, closets, your life’s priorities.

3)  Take the last few of whatever random vitamins or supplements that have been occupying precious shelf space for, ahhemm, years. Complete project number 2 first and you will be sure not to do anything dangerous. Also, read labels for side-effects and interactions. Caution: never proceed directly to project number 1, wait at least 3 hours. Also, make sure you have consumed food, not just several cups of coffee before beginning.

4)   Floss. Yeah, right.

5)   Find a recipe which will use up your entire dessicated and long avoided supplies of odd food items like dried coconut powder, tamarind pulp or brewer’s yeast (or combines them all like a chef version of Jekyl and Hyde, then serve the concoction to your significant other). Oops, coconut powder was moldy, definitely don’t serve to your beloved.

6)  Research the effects of an overdose of apple cider vinegar pills at the earliest onset of dizziness.

7)  Spend quality time with your pet, they are as bored as you are today and probably irritated that you have been re-organizing everything. See how annoyed she looks.

see how annoyed she looks

8)  Whatever you do, DON’T read any self-help books, otherwise you might end up crazy like the mom in American Beauty. You can read self-help books on sunny days, cloudy days even, but never on rainy days. If you feel compelled to learn something get your car manual out and find the page with the instructions on how to change the clock, copy it and clip it to the front of the manual. Maybe the next time daylight savings changes you will spend less time fumbling with the buttons convincing yourself that you remember how to change it.

9)  Remove at least one piece of wall art that has outlived its sentimental hold on you. Dig deep, you can do it.

10) Write a letter (a polite one lest I need to remind you) of complaint to the last store/service/company/$%^&* that was unsatisfactory to you.  They need to know, really.  Especially if it was your cell phone company. Cell phone companies are evil.

Lastly, drink more coffee, you earned it.

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